The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
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