I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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