SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Randomize
