Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
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