Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
