All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
