You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize