just come out here and I will go home with you...
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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