dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
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i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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