why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
