Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
