You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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