Michael Bay diarrhea
this just has baby written all over it
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Randomize
