you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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