No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
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