So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
