At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Randomize
