you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
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