im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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