woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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