She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
So apparently I’m into choking now
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
