dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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