Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Randomize