it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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