Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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