Texts From Last Night

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  (313): View more from Michigan

  I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl

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  (313): I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl http://tfl.nu/zim9
  Replies (2) Good night (714) Bad night (1164)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  dude did u upper deck my toilet?

  (1-314): View more from Missouri

  haha like two months ago

  (314): View more from Missouri

  i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u

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  (314): dude did u upper deck my toilet? (1-314): haha like two months ago (314): i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u http://tfl.nu/8xxw
  Replies (38) Good night (888) Bad night (4270)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.

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  (443): That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face. http://tfl.nu/yqg0
  Replies (11) Good night (652) Bad night (2441)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?

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  (248): Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"? http://tfl.nu/h596
  Replies (38) Good night (4607) Bad night (2503)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.

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  (440): Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade. http://tfl.nu/kiie
  Replies (20) Good night (5576) Bad night (1450)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document

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  (570): I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document http://tfl.nu/k2y9
  Replies (49) Good night (1240) Bad night (6087)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway

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  (727): what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway http://tfl.nu/b3sf
  Replies (23) Good night (2312) Bad night (7034)
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  (925): View more from California

  So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.

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  (925): So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made. http://tfl.nu/hust
  Replies (22) Good night (8784) Bad night (1327)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.

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  (724): Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them. http://tfl.nu/a4j7
  Replies (17) Good night (992) Bad night (6110)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad

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  (203): The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad http://tfl.nu/q1tx
  Replies (16) Good night (3224) Bad night (910)
• Favorite

  (806): View more from Texas

  Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap

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  (806): Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap http://tfl.nu/wtva
  Replies (5) Good night (1316) Bad night (441)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!

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  (608): WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?! http://tfl.nu/0ru3
  Replies (2) Good night (1731) Bad night (476)
• Favorite

  (719): View more from Colorado

  If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message

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  (719): If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message http://tfl.nu/usun
  Replies (1) Good night (1238) Bad night (348)
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow

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  (989): He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow http://tfl.nu/xfxq
  Replies (2) Good night (252) Bad night (595)
• Favorite

  (218): View more from Minnesota

  last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.

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  (218): last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat. http://tfl.nu/thb6
  Replies (0) Good night (173) Bad night (140)

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