no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
