If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
