Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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