whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
