i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize