Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
