Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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