What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Randomize
