I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
