I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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