Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
