The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
