I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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