guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
