I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
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