Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
