If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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