She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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