I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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