ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize