Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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