so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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