well most of my day revolves around power hour
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
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