i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
