yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
