So drunk its hurt
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize