i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize