She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
